I am planning on visiting the High Style exhibit at the Legion of Honor, and I was going to wait until after that to do my next blog.
But there have been some thoughts stewing in my head since earlier this afternoon and I feel like spilling it all out. Normally I would just do that in my private journal but for some reason I want to let my guard down right now and let the world know that I'm only human too.
(Not that I have that many readers anyway, I don't plan on hyping this site until I have the shop section up.)
The question on my mind right now is this:
What's the best thing to do when you begin realizing that you still have feelings for someone?
The keyword being still, implying that maybe it's past the point of it being "reasonable" to continue feeling that way. Over 350 years ago, the master courtier Baltasar Gracian wrote that imperturbability is the spirit's most sublime quality. And that's pretty much what men are taught even today. Don't be emotional, vulnerable-- that's weak, that's needy, that's desperate, that's unattractive, and repellent. Don't catch "one-itis."
So should you tell that person about it, and hope that they feel something too?
I think in my own case it's best if I just step back for now and let Fate/God/uncontrollable-neurological-impulses decide what happens this time...
I dabbled in palmistry in the past, mostly to help with talking to chicks haha... But I do find it genuinely interesting. Though I'm not superstitious, I find all things occult to be very interesting-- tarot, astrology, numerology, etc.
Most people have two separate lines in the middle of their palm (the Heart Line and the Head Line), but mine are connected into one line. That's a rare line called a Simian Crease. I'm gonna oversimplify here but you guys have google anyway. Basically a Simian Crease is a fusing of the Heart Line and the Head Line. In palmistry it is a marker of INTENSITY, and passion. Its bearer has tendency to intertwine thoughts with feelings. Many of its bearers are successful because they are able to pour all their energy and drive single-mindedly into accomplishing something. But it also means that its bearer will have more intense focus on their problems as well.
Right now, I want to commit all that drive and focus into something productive. But my heart and my mind just keep wanting to focus on something else.
That's where I'm at right now.