Just finished watching the Pacquiao - Mayweather fight and for whatever reason I feel like blogging. And I'm bloated by food, alcohol, and of course coffee...
***Before I continue, this one is going to be just kind of a ramble of thoughts so it's not really an update on my projects or anything!***
No prank calls please...
But let me begin with a small update about my work situation. Last week I started finalizing my portfolio and dusting off my resume. I have to admit I'm a little embarrassed that I left one minor mistake on my resume when doing my first four submissions. But out of those I DID get one interview with an agency that specializes in fashion jobs in the San Francisco area. Very positive interview and I'm confident that it will be a big help in my job search.
Above, is my new business card. It was pretty pricey because I got spot gloss and there's a little picture on the back in full color (gotta get one of my cards if you wanna see it!) and I also opted for a high-end paper. But I'm very satisfied with how they came out.
3 books to the left are what's on my plate right now. Meditations I finished late 2014 and it greatly influenced the way I'm currently handling my life.
Let me start by saying that I don't mean to sound pretentious-- although you could argue anything preceded by that phrase usually does come off pretentious --but very few people in my life share real conversations with me on a regular basis. Out of the people I currently am in contact with, I only need one hand to count the people that I do share those interactions with. And believe it or not, 2 out of those 5 people I have never met face-to-face. It's strange how we easily find those types of relationships in the 21st century....
I work in retail sales in a large store, in a large metropolitan city and I commute using public transportation as well. So I am constantly exposed to people and the general public. I meet hundreds of new people every week and that is no exaggeration. I'm constantly interacting. But about 90% or maybe closer to 95% of those interactions are completely shallow. I don't mean that negatively but that's just what it is. Shallow, day-to-day interaction. And so the people I interact with on a real level mean a lot to me. One of them-- I'll call her "ST" --has been encouraging me to share more of my thoughts on my blog. I've been hesitant to do that because a lot of our most meaningful discourse has just come about naturally; mostly through sharing our troubles with each other. Much of that is personal and would come off preachy if I just started rambling about it here.
But anyway I guess I'll begin by sharing a few thoughts on something we were discussing earlier today. Just some general perspective on spirituality and religion. I have to say I feel like I've come full circle in that aspect. I grew up VERY "religious." I went to church every week, sometimes even 2 or 3 times to practice for choir or to help my dad set up the A/V system. Our pastor even picked me up from school when I was little. Most of my friends were from church, and pretty much all the childhood friends I still have contact with are those church friends. I had this thing for awhile, going around with a walking stick and holding a bible calling myself "Johnny Appleseed" (I wish I was kidding).
Then sometime in high school I did a full 360. I had two philosophy teachers, because I transferred in the middle of that school year. And both of them had a great impact on me in more ways than one. Neither one of them pushed me to make the decision, but I became an atheist. And I was a hard atheist, even criticizing people that I thought were "blind."
But I guess you can say while I never went back to "religion," I discovered my own spirituality in dealing with life's challenges as I transitioned from teenager to young adult. I had a lot of setbacks and after each one, my spirituality became more and more defined. While I don't think I'll be regularly participating in organized religion again anytime soon, I feel more spiritually connected than ever. I now have respect and tolerance for people that DO choose to participate-- with the exception of those on the extreme of course.
ommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
So recently I've been reflecting on some stories from the bible that I loved when I was a kid. I feel like I'm finally beginning to realize the purpose of scripture. As a child I took those stories LITERALLY. I thought that was all they were meant to be and so when I found out as a "free-thinking," rational teenager that there was little to no archeological or historical validation for these stories I felt disenchanted.
*By the way in case you were wondering, at this point in writing I AM sober hahaha....*
Two of the stories I've been thinking on are the very end of the Exodus story, and Samson and Delilah. I've been telling a lot of people my interpretations lately.
To recap the end of the Exodus, for those without a Christian background, God promised the Hebrews the Promised Land after he delivered them from bondage in Egypt. All they had to do was move in and take the Promised Land from the Canaanites. The Hebrews sent spies on a 40-day mission to scout Canaan and found it truly was a land "flowing with milk and honey."
But they harbored doubts about God's promise because they saw the great walled cities of its inhabitants, who they claimed were gigantic and made them feel as small as grasshoppers. Despite God's promise they felt it would be impossible to take the Promised Land.
Because of their doubt, God denied them the Promised Land and forced them to wander the desert for 40 years until all the doubters died off.
The message for me is this: When you doubt yourself (or God, or whatever "power" you believe in) and your ability to succeed, you deny yourself the blessings of the Universe. Everything you want in life can be yours-- the Promised Land --but only if you proceed without self-doubt. Doubt yourself and you are doomed to "wander in the desert."
It's such a simple message yet, I think as a child I just didn't have the life experience to see the lessons in the stories. I was telling ST that even though we don't necessarily *need* scriptures for these lessons (we have self-help books, "gurus," blogs, scientific studies, psychology), learning through symbolic storytelling connects with you on a different level because it touches our emotional/spiritual layer rather than just the logical one. And believe me if logic were really the best-and-only way to learn life's lessons, then nobody would be learning "the hard way."
Anyway, I'm going to leave it at that and talk about the Samson and Delilah thing another time. Also I wanted to touch on a couple other topics but I'll save those for another time too. This entry has already crossed into tl;dr territory.
If you took the time to read it all, THANK YOU! And feel free to share your thoughts in the comments.
